In the days and weeks surrounding the holidays I am always reminded of a theological truth known as Generational sin. The phrase itself sounds rather archaic when I am honest, medieval even. The notion that the sins of future generations trickle down to fall squarely on the shoulders of proceeding generations after them sounds more like pagan witchcraft, the stuff of fairy tales, than it does anything remotely theological, let alone Biblical. And yet we find it so clearly presented to us in the pages of scripture. In several passages God tells his people, in no uncertain terms, that God is a jealous God who will punish children for the sins of their fathers to the third and fourth generations. (Ex. 20:5, 34:7; Deut. 5:9; Num. 14:11). The book of Lamentations puts it more bluntly, “Our fathers sinned, and are no more; It is we who have borne their iniquities (Lam. 5:7).
Beyond the fact that this sounds out of line with God’s just character, what sort of practical hope is there for those of us born into families full of sinners? What is the fate for those who grew up hearing stories about Grampa’s wandering eyes, or Grandmas alcoholism, or for those who suffered under the hand of a violent father or a manipulative mother? In short, what I am struggling to answer for myself, and my children is, when will the curse ever end? If the ingredients for generational sin hinge on the perfection of the previous generation, who will ever escape?
I remember one of my final sessions of premarital counseling when the pastor excused my wife and asked me to stay behind. I assumed he had done so to simply relay to me (once again), the rather obvious fact that I was wholly unworthy of my future bride. But when my fiancé had exited, I realized that the pastor’s face was far more serious than I had seen it before. He was prone to sarcasm, but this day his expression was decidedly different. When he did finally begin to speak he backtracked through my sordid family tree, reiterating at every point the simple truth that by embarking on my own marital journey, I was also taking on a grand spiritual responsibility to break the generational sin that hung off my shoulders like a wet sweater. He looked across the desk and said “no matter what else you may ever be called to in your life, you are called first to break the sin cycles of your family.”
That conversation was one that I continually point back to as one in which I had a distinct encounter with God. I am reticent to speak often about “hearing from God”, but there are just a handful of moments in my life that, on a deeply spiritual level, the Spirit of God spoke to me in a away every bit as real as an audible voice. This was one of those times. It wasn’t the first time I had ever thought about generational sin, but it was the first time I had ever contemplated the possibility that something could be done about them, that they even could be “broken” in some way.
What I have learned in the years since that first conversation by raising three boys, marriage, and counseling countless others who share a similar story, is that generational sins are broken, not through penance but through repentance. What I mean is that there is a consequential reality to sin; children do pay a price for the sins of their parents, yet paying the price alone does not stop the cycle. In fact, what I believe the Bible is telling us is that if left unnamed, the sins of previous generations are destined to become our own struggles if we are not intentional about repenting of them. Repenting, literally “to turn around”, is the means by which the curse of generational sins is broken.
So today I have learned to read the scriptures with new eyes and what I see them saying to us is that “the sins of the fathers will visit the coming generations…IF…future generations let them.” The process is not an easy one, but perhaps more simple than we imagine. Rather than playing the role of the victim each of us needs to have the courage to peer back into our past and read our story with an eye to the struggles, addictions and failures of previous generations. Then three things need to happen. One, name them. Adultery, divorce, addiction, abuse, greed, violence, lawlessness- name it. Second, recognize that the same blood fills your veins. Their story is intimately connected to yours and the consequence of these sins has visited you in the form of a natural propensity to sin in the very same way. So, thirdly, you repent. You examine the contours of your current life and attempt to see the natural bent of your life towards the sins of the future generations and fight like mad to do things differently. It is not a process that is done alone. In fact, many of us can accomplish it without some degree of professional help, and no attempt will ever be permanent or completely transformational unless the Author of your story is also the one you are trusting to write the next chapter.
Will future generations be cursing your name for the sins that have been passed down to them, or will they recognize you as the one through which the endless cycle of familial sin was finally broken?
